Fantastic . . ?

Starring: Ioan Gruffudd, Jessica Alba, Chris Evans, Michael Chiklis, Julian McMahon, Kerry Washington, Andre Braugher, Laurence Fishburne (voice), Doug Jones, Beau Garrett, Brian Posehn, Zach Grenier, Kenneth Welsh, Patricia Harras, Gonzalo Menendez
Written by: Mark Frost, Don Payne, based on a story by Mark Frost, John Turman
Directed by: Tim Story
MPAA Rating: PG for sequences of action violence, some mild language and innuendo
Running Time: 92 minutes

The Fantastic Four : Rise of the Silver Surfer

It’s up to the spandex-clad Fantastic 4 to save our world. Ahem. I have to admit, I went to see the super visual effects and CG, but despite the cool visuals the movie was quite a let-down.

If the director was attempting to show the more human, less super-hero side of the Fantastics, he failed miserably. Glitz and glitter affect the soon-to-be-married couple, and the notorious playboy is having, or trying to have, an emotional crisis. The characters have plenty of potential for real humour, what with a sexy girl who can turn invisible and her brother who goes up in flames. But her lying naked in the middle of a New York street mumbling “Why does this always happen to me?”. Lazy, lazy. Oozing with unnecessary cheesy lines, the script would have been better off if it was written by my Labrador puppy.

Acting. What’s that? Jessica Alba’s blue contact lenses, peroxide hair and fabulous figure do not make up for her lack of acting skills. And that’s just one of the Fantastics.
Villains are supposed to be fun. Doom was far from it being simply unconvincing with a lot of messy lines. Forget clichéd, this is a cartoon meant for kids, it has to be clichéd. That doesn’t mean the same as nonsensical however. The ending, in addition to being a letdown, is nonsensical. A lot of what happens in the film, including the re-introduction of Dr. Doom, feels completely arbitrary.

The special effects will have many slack-jawed though, like the kid behind who loudly gasped “Woooow!” every once in a while. And the Silver Surfer is the only one in the movie who deserved to have his name in the title of the movie. In fact, it should have been called just ‘The Silver Surfer’. I found myself groaning because I knew he would sacrifice his life for the silly Sue (Jessica Alba).

If I didn’t like it, I can only imagine how cartoon lovers may have cringed or cried at the movie.